thatresiliencecoach.com

Image

Coaching Is… Coaching Is Not… Coaching Could Be… For Me.

I am, these days, often in the position of explaining the power and potential of coaching to people who are not familiar with the coaching process.

Coaching Is Not…

One of the very first things we are taught at MasterMyLife (MML), where I obtained my coaching certification, is that coaching is not mentoring, is not therapy and is not training.

A rudimentary outline of the ways each of these is different is outlined below:

Coaching: In partnership with a certified coach, an assignment that typically aims at creating behavioural and performance change. It is designed as a collaboration, to help the client find their own solutions through a process of self-discovery, typically carried out via one on one conversation, and can include various tools such as visualisation and breath work. No advice is given in this approach.

Training: Transfer of knowledge in a specific context, delivered by a subject matter expert with the objective of acquiring specific knowledge or skills. Learning is based on pre-determined learning curriculum, and the approach is usually a directive, top-down one.

Therapy / Counselling: Carried out by a qualified mental health professional, with the ability to diagnose disorders and behavioural issues, helping a client delve deeper into their past to understand and learn to deal with blocks, traumas etc. Advice and guidance are part of this approach.

Mentoring: Delivered by someone who is in a more senior position in the same field of expertise and who can accompany and advise on their mentee’s professional journey including technical decisions and know-how. Advice is given in this approach.

That is not to say there is no overlap. However, in understanding the boundaries of each, a clear intent can be applied to whatever objectives a person is seeking to achieve.
I would love to hear from you if the distinctions between each of these is something of interest. Please feel free to share any further insights on these if you have any!

Coaching Is…

In the meantime, here are some things that coaching IS that I would like to share:

It is work. And it can be hard work for a lot of us. Knowing yourself better can get messy, unpleasant, and taxing before it gets rewarding. And working to change yourself can be highly challenging when you are tackling entrenched habits and beliefs. It is not for the faint-hearted and often giving up feels like an easier option.

 

  • But don’t be afraid, it is ALSO the secret gateway to building a cohesive future – It can touch upon a wide range of seemingly unconnected aspects of your life and help you find the common threads that will help you determine your next steps. 

 

  • It is a roadmap and a way of taking control. Done right, it can allow you to live your life with mindfulness and teach you to be deliberate in your choices.

 

  • It can be a relief – The right coach can make you feel seen and will help to remind you of the power you hold to design your future. 

 

  • It is a learning curve. Coaching, I have found, is one of those things that gives back as much as you put in. One of the things all of my clients have in common, and that I derive the most inspiration from, is the ability to keep challenging themselves and accept the unexpected as part of the journey.

 

  • It will help you be more in touch with the values that define your life and underpin your big decisions. Working with the right coach can help you break out of an undesirable pattern, prioritise, as well as bring wonderful clarity to your path.

Coaching Could be…

So now you maybe have an idea of what it takes to enter the process.. but it does occur to me to also showcase how diverse and profound even one session can be, by sharing below, three quotes from three wildly different clients.

I typically wrap up a session by exploring with my clients, their key learnings and what distilled wisdom can be extracted from the conversation, that can further be used as a building block for the future.
Here are three powerful insights shared with me recently, in response to the question “What is a valuable learning you would like to hold on to for yourself?”

1. “I don’t want to compromise on my life..I need to be there for myself” How that session started:

“I need to improve my self-awareness and boundaries”

2. “I now know to remind myself –

Don’t act out of fear, happiness is the key” How that session started: “I have been challenged this week”

3. “Action precedes motivation”

How that session started: “I need to improve my online presence”

If any of these resonated with you then you are maybe getting what I am trying to articulate (with so little elegance!) in this article – that we see in others, struggles that seem familiar to us…but ultimately each of our paths is different, as are the values that we choose to live by.
How we decide to grow from what we are confronted by, is also radically different for each of us. At the end of the day, our inner voice is the only one that can truly guide us.
And THAT is also a fundamental reason why working with a coach can be a game-changer for your personal life or career. We were not designed to be lone operators. True meaningful connection, to ourselves and to each other, feeds our soul and ignites our true spirit.
It is an increasingly tangible truth to me that there are few things in life more important than being connected to our purpose and being in touch with who we are. It is also undeniable that sometimes we need help with that! Are you ready for what coaching can do for you?
Send this to someone who can benefit from exploring this idea further!